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Quotes

2x01 The Enemy Walks In

VAUGHN: "If we could actually be seen in public together we'd get The Bible and get a bite."

WEISS: "Yeah, can the whole team come? 'Cause I'm starving."


2x12 The Getaway

WEISS: "Hey. ... You sure you don't want to talk about this?"

VAUGHN: "There's nothing to talk about."

WEISS: "I share my fights with you!"

VAUGHN: "No you don't."

WEISS: "Yeah, I do. Remember when Alan pissed in the living room?"

VAUGHN: "That was your dog."

WEISS: "Yeah, but I was angry about it and I let you know how upset I was."

VAUGHN: "I appreciate you trying to cheer me up. You don't have to do that."

WEISS: "All right, here's a thought. Tell her how you feel. ... I know, I know, I was the one who said this is a line you don't cross but that was before I nearly died. And you know what they say about the white light and all that? No. They're wrong. It's darkness. Darkness."

VAUGHN: "I understand."



WEISS: And?

VAUGHN: We're going to dinner.

WEISS: Ooooh yah! (He does a little dance.)

VAUGHN: I'm going to keep my comm channel open. I need you to monitor the RF frequency.

WEISS: Got it. Okay. In exchange I'll take an eclair.

VAUGHN: No, I'm serious. Any suspect signal, I want to know about it. Anything.

WEISS: If they're small, bring at least two.



VAUGHN: Okay, the Boy Scouts have a motto--

Sydney: Always be prepared.

VAUGHN: (nods) On my first day, I showed up and I had forgotten my field manual so the instructor said, "That is your one screwup. And from then on, you'd better be prepared."

WEISS: (on comm) This story is a disaster!

(Vaughn looks humiliated, gestures to his ear where his comm link is.)

WEISS: (on comm) Just tell her she's pretty! Are you an idiot?

VAUGHN: Okay, I'm going to turn you off now. Goodbye.



WEISS: This your uh, debrief for Kendall?

VAUGHN: Yeah.

WEISS: (reads) Okay, you can't show him this. No, I'm serious. If Kendall sees this--

VAUGHN: He needs to know why SD-6 has the real gyroscope.

WEISS: I agree. I think so, too. But this requires a little creativity. Look, tell him it was my fault, okay? Tell him that, um, grinding the lenses took a little longer than expected and we weren't ble to make Sydney's plane.

VAUGHN: I won't let you cover for me.

WEISS: I'm not but it's partially my fault too. I'm the one who told you to take her on a date.

VAUGHN: You told me to tell her how I feel.

WEISS: Whatever. I'm three-months past a near death experience, what the hell are you doing listening to my advice for?

VAUGHN: I'm recommending that I be replaced as her case officer.

WEISS: Okay, now you're just being stupid. I'm sorry, but that's ridi--

VAUGHN: I nearly blew our entire operation inside SD-6. Not to mention putting Sydney's life in danger.

WEISS: Hey, she wanted to go to dinner, too. She's a big girl. She knew the risks.

VAUGHN: My point is that my judgment was compromised.

WEISS: Not to mention the fact that all the damage that you and Sydney have done to SD-6 -- have you given any thought to the fact that maybe all that work was done because of the way you feel about each other? (pause) How's that for spin.

VAUGHN: It's not bad.

WEISS: Well, whatever you decide to do, just make sure you discuss this with Sydney first, okay? I mean, this affects her too.


2x13 Phase One

WEISS: "What is this, the flirting corner?"

VAUGHN: "Uh, we're talking."

WEISS: "Yeah, I figured that out. Uh, there's a meeting. National security, remember that? It's important... for the people?"


WEISS: "Okay, whenever you want to have that talk..."

VAUGHN: "What talk?"

WEISS: "About the cologne or whatever the hell you're wearing."

VAUGHN: "I'm not wearing cologne."

WEISS: "Well, something's going on. No man naturally smells as good as you do right now."


VAUGHN: "That son of a bitch!"

WEISS: "Easy. Come on."

VAUGHN: "I swear I'm gonna kill this guy."


WEISS: "There's no way that guy smells as good as you."

VAUGHN: "It's aftershave. I got a new aftershave."

WEISS: "Yeah, well, I'd lighten up on it."

VAUGHN: "Yeah?"

WEISS: "Oh, yeah. To the point of non-use."


WEISS: "She's all yours."


WEISS: "Hey, guys...I just talked to base, we did it. We kicked their asses. ... Hey...guys, did you hear what I said? Asses...kicked."


2x16 Firebomb

WEISS: "Hey. Kendall has something he wants to show you."

VAUGHN: "Uh, can it wait?"

WEISS: "Apparently not. He wants Sydney, too. Are you with her?"

VAUGHN: "Uh, no, I haven't seen her."

WEISS: "You're in bed with her right now, aren't you?"

VAUGHN: "I'm trying. Just find out what he wants."


2x19 Endgame

WEISS: She gave you a drawer, huh?

VAUGHN: It was a gesture of convenience.

WEISS: And, uh, what did you put in it?

VAUGHN: Why do you care?

WEISS: What do you mean, why do I care? Do you know how spoiled you are? You know, a drawer! I wish I had a girlfriend to say "Hey, do you want a drawer?"

VAUGHN: I'll give you a drawer at my place.

WEISS: I don't want a drawer at your place.


WEISS: Jack is going to shoot you in the face.

VAUGHN: Just give me a half-hour head start. Tell him that she called your phone and you gave it to me. We only have ten hours to find Caplan.

WEISS: If we end up sharing a cell in federal prison, I'm not giving you a drawer.


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